Training Hearts: A Journey of Discipline and Grace

I remember that when I turned 18 and was finally “free” from my dad’s household and rules, I felt liberated, finally. No more curfews, no more accountability, no more “no’s” to do things, no more “because I say so’s”. I felt so free, no one, and nothing stood in the way of what I wanted my life to look like. But although I felt free, I was actually in the most danger than I had ever been before in my life. 

Consider a sheep in a sheep pen protected from the wolves, versus a sheep in the open country, ideal prey for the wolves. I think the world has fed us a false idea of freedom. There is powerfully proven research that has explored the need for rules in a child’s life. Though children tend to rebel against authorities at times, psychology tells us that children have a sense of security when there are rules that hinder them from the full extent of their imagination. Although giving the child a deep emotional state of security, rules, and authority of parenthood teach children social norms and skills as well as consequences. They crave boundaries deep down, even if their emotions are very different. It gives that sense of protection to them even if at the cost of them not being able to do what they want. It gives them security and safety, just like a sheep pen, although restricting provides lifesaving safety. 

So being a legal adult for the first time, my dad gave me the freedom I thought I always wanted. It was in that same year, that I fell deep into a number of serious addictions. I lost all control of myself and hit rock bottom mentally. Now I would envy the days when I had a curfew. The rules were so much more worth the security, family, and safety I was in. I would rather have boundaries and be told no, but also experience trust, love,e, and consideration than be free of rules and lost in which way to go in life. 

Now I understand the story of the prodigal son in Luke 15 a bit better. He desired freedom, but what he believed to be freedom ended up enslaving him. True freedom is in the protection of the Father’s hands. Likewise, I think of scriptures like Matthew 18:8. It is better to be crippled and restricted in that way than free to be in actuality a slave to sin and eternal death. Psychology proves this unapologetically. The only environment that allows a child to flourish and live has rules. The child may not like the rules emotionally, but they are the only thing that keeps them safe and alive. 

Looking at my life, I need to see God as the considerate Father He is. A parent who does not discipline their child is neglectful and absent. Far be it from God to be a Father like that. And for some reason, I never really saw it that way, until I saw proven psychology lining up with the values of the Bible. God knew it first before any psychologist because God made us that way. He made us like sheep to be in a flock of sheep with a fence, because the Lord knows the vicious wolves in the hill country, though we may not see them. 

So in closing, I don’t just see the Bible and psychology come together, but my life also be a testament to it. I became enslaved to sin and addictions real quick when I didn’t have the authority of rules above me. So I fight to have the perspective, that I would not take for granted the privileges and rules I have in my Heavenly Father’s house as His daughter. Though my emotions may rebel at times, I now know that outside of His Household lies death. 

Discover more of Anna’s Moricz’s journey -—- Check out her social media profiles below!